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we could then select our home where its surroundings suit us best under such circumstances I should select home that would be surrounded by the best possible society & would fill it with all the elegancies & refining influences that a cultivated taste could require without regard to cost. I think that there are few who would enjoy such a home more than me. It is however worse than folly for us to aspire to such a home as neither of us inherited fortunes. With us the selection of a home carries with it the problem for solution "what is the best possible home we can have & at the same time clothe & feed ourselves & children." We might take what little we have & purchase a comfortable home in some village, but how should we live after we had such a home. I see no way. If we were both well it would be a different thing. I could not confine myself to an indoor business or act as a clerk or bookkeeper & live but a short time. You know this & it is a matter that we must look right in the face. You know that it is very seldom that any one who bleeds at the lungs live but a short time, & that the only reason I am now alive is that I have been cheerful & have taken care of myself & avoided all close confinement to office work & have been out in the open air as much as possible. It seems to me that my own folks those who love me best ought to be