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got along so pleasantly, better than I expected, that I really thought I liked it; but the other day, since school closed, I happened to go into the barn and thresh a spell, and was irresistably, struck with the conclusion that there was no kind of work, I ever performed, that, no more indolent than I have yet become, I should not prefer to keeping school! Still I have enjoyed myself finely this fall. The fact is, a beneficent Providence has kindly formed me for enjoyment, for taking pleasure in whatever my hands find to do, and in whatever I do I find pleasure, more so perhaps then in some things I am sometimes obliged to think. and I doubt not I shall enjoy myself, whatever be my circumstances. I certainly am not, but much the quantity! I meant contrary! Perhaps, I ought not to have written such a mess of stuff, as this letter contains, to put a lot of foolish ideas in your head, that rarely find place in mine. I don't know but these are eather (sic) an evasion of the question. I fully agree with your remark about decision. I certainly feel the need of some such 'definite purpose in view, as a stimulant sense of duty I expect is too much lacking, to exertion, something to call into real exercise all the power. It is essential to a really valuable success. I really feel its lack. But - how? I have thought of it, this fall, noticing, (I frequently notice things) noticing some young men, striving to merit, and to win, to make themselves worthy of, some young woman, really worth striving for; I have almost envied some of them, some of them especially. For instance, a young surveyor now up to Lake unclear engaged on the Rail Road exploring, to whom a nice girl, sitting at this same table, is just writing a fine long letter!!!

Your Affectionate Son I.S. Metcalf.