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2 it. It never brought me to anything but dirty ?. What purity I have got has come from the contempt of what is called being competent in life. Why should I feel that way - that is to say that competence is anything. It is all too cheap - too easy. This naturally led me over to my present attitude. I presume I got tired and gave it up. The manner I had wanted things - severity? in life and all that. I thought I could perhaps be fairly ? and that wouldn't matter. It did. I came nearer and nearer the middle class. Those people, with their houses lands, auto mobiles. It makes me sick to think how near I came to going over to them.