.MTIxNQ.OTQ1MjU
April 1st 1848
Dear Brother
A fortnight ago Eliah brought me your interesting and most welcome letter, it contains much that I should like to talk over with you O: how much - but it is not so easy to convey the thoughts in writing just as they exist in the mind. The glance of the eye - the kindling of the countenance, gives the soul to words, - gives almost intuitively, the precise shade of thought intended, while in writing, some very trivial misapprehension may give a little tone or colouring to the sentence, so as to make a slight differene in the expression conveyed.
This train of thought I have been led into by your answer to my remarks about Joseph, which, I wrote down as they came into my head, just as I should have talked on if I had been conversing with you upon the same subject, in which case we should probably think about alike. I lay very little stress, comparatively, upon what may be termed, the drawing room accomplishments of a gentleman, - and the same my probably be said of my sex generally, - and manly easy and a simple naturalness of manner, is a thousand times more acceptable to women, than the 'bowing and surfacing 'politeness, - exquisite etiquettes, of even an elegant nicety of appearance, However different it may be, and no doubt is, with the other sex, I believe it to be true, that women are not the most attracted by beauty or mere external advantages; we feel in our nature, or desire of superiority, of something to lean upon, to look up to, to respect: it is talents, manly good sense, strength of character and a good degree of estimation among his fellow men, that wins the heart of women. It is perfectly natural that it should not be so with your sex, the same want is not felt and here lies the reason I suppose why men so often seek a fine face, form, or showy appearance merely, without so much reference to mind and character.