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Remsen July 7, 1853 My Dear Sister Innocence -

 We think that letter of yours worth about a shilling and so John wishes me to forward that amount from him immediately as he has concluded to go in the ready pay system in future - I shall therefore defir sending those cards till my next. Now I have a very grievious thing to communicate to you - a sad thing - a something that weighs heavily upon my heart - something that I fain would leave unsaid, - something that dims my eyes as I write it - Yes I must tell you what I shrink from even thinking - I must write it Letter by letter till it is all spread out on the page before me. as if it were not Enough to feel it all at once but it must come up to my consciousness by piece meal as a barbarian executioner drains out the life blood of his victim drop by drop - I must tell you but not now lest your health too feeble to endure the shock - so nerve your heart and  

sickness would be some what more lingering than it otherwise would or have been but there was nothing dangerous in her case - I think she will get along now she has some body that isn't unclear or satisfied with opinion to Doctor her. He says the same as the other Drs have, relative to her situation John says he is about as ususal The storm has not prevented him from coming home yet - I guess it wont Either when I'm here - Give my love to unclear Best her and Mattie Chamberlain and Martha Eastman and you know who all who to the use of writing down forty names remember Miss Shattuck but remember She dont come on the above list Ask Miss Scott if I cant come once graduate next summer tell her my man says he'll be Examiner for me in all the studies of the courses that I haven't got - and if she objects tell her I think some of the graduates need a "better half" to answer for them at least would be greatly for the credit of the school if they had one I believe I've answered all your questions John guesses he'll send his love to you I suppose you can read his guessing cant you - I forgot to tell you that I am very well considering who I am Yours unclear unclear