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The Drug Addict As A Parent

 

Note. Take a look at https://www.adfam.org.uk/, and you will see that problems affecting the children of addicts can extend through to their education, health, and personal development.
Addiction can be very hard in any personal relationship. Things get even more difficult for children when parents are addicts.
Children often have to deal with poverty, neglect, and physical abuse as their parents struggle with addictions. While it is true that addicted parents cannot be trusted to make a living, many people can do this with a degree. However, rehabilitation is always advisable.
Ask any professional in addiction recovery or a rehabilitated addict and you will find that they are selfish. They will do anything for their drug-adopted family, and then they slowly neglect their real family.
Although it isn't always intentional, it is a time-consuming process that can result in you spending a lot of time and effort to earn (or steal) money for drugs, then source them, and then take those drugs and all the side effects. Where is your time for your family?
A sad fact is that many children are born dependent on drugs their mothers have given them during pregnancy. Many addicts feel guilty and turn to drugs to drown their guilt. It's a vicious circle indeed.
The good news is that many parents have resisted the urge and now live happy, fulfilled lives with their children.
Many people live recklessly and put their loved ones at risk. The only way to get clean is to abstain. The choice between drug and family is futile when the addict is full of cravings. If the addict can get clean, drugs will always win.

The Addict as a Mother

We all know that mothers are the heart of family life. While fathers play an important and central role in the lives of most children, the Mother is their rock. When that rock becomes evasive and moody, aggressive, depressed, or slippery, it can lead to children living a fight or flight lifestyle that will continue into adulthood.
A mental disorder known as drug addiction is when a person feels the need to use drugs. This can happen even though they are causing harm to others or themselves. A common problem is maternal drug addiction, which can cause many dysfunctions in the care of children.
According to a SAMHSA research report, 13 percent of children under 17 years old live in homes with at least one parent who is addicted.
Treatment is the only way to end an addiction. The mother is the most important person in the family's dynamics. Their role in the welfare of their children is crucial. We must take great care when dealing with mother addiction so that the child's development and health are not affected.

Indicators of Drug Addiction

What are the effects of mother addiction?

If a mother is addicted to drugs, she will not be able to stop it. This will have a significant impact on the children's lives in the following ways.
* Low academic performance
* Depression and stress
* Rejection
* Behavioral issues
* Malnourishment
* A decline in self-esteem, confidence
* Feelings of being 'not normal' and bullying. Even though they may not mean to be cruel, other children can be very cruel and can make it difficult for addict's children. They will often feel worthless and will become more depressed. This can lead to bad friends choices, later boyfriends and careers, and even crime.

How to live with your children as an addicted mother

As with other diseases, drug addiction can be discussed at the household level. Talking about addiction with your children is not a breach of morality or character.
There are many ways to organize household chores and responsibilities. Mummy may be 'under', but this is only cosmetic. The only way to stop is to stop.
Sometimes it is hard to quit. The following guide will help you keep your children healthy even if you are an addicted mother.

Tell your children the truth about the situation.

As addiction progresses, it can lead to the loss of family welfare. Your children may notice an abnormality in the behavior of their mom, but they might not be able to fully comprehend what is happening.
Let them know what is going on and clear the air. This will help to prevent other children from filling the void by bringing in nonsense or judgemental adults. Don't be too private or secretive, as it could inadvertently harm your family's health. It depends on the maturity of the child as to what and how they should be told.

Talk with your children about addiction.

Your children will be aware of the fact that mommy is acting erratically and unusually, so they will believe you are sick. Talk to your children about addiction and explain how it happens.
Do not hesitate to tell them that addiction can be caused by unhealthy lifestyle choices. To put it another way,... to avoid.

Get to know your children's opinions about the situation

Children are affected by the world around them. It is important to get their opinions.
Create a safe environment for them to express themselves and tell them that addiction is a disease. You may find your children believe that mom will never stop drinking and therefore do not care about their welfare.
They should understand that their addiction is not their fault and that they can't control or heal it.
Children can take everything so personally. If they were good enough to love Mummy enough, they wouldn't have to look for drugs.
This terrible sense of responsibility can cause long-term damage to children. They may begin to resent their parents for the pain they have suffered over the years from addiction.

Teach them the nature of addiction.

Your children need to understand that addiction can be a chronic, relapsing condition and that quick recovery is not possible. These relapses can happen and Mum doesn't care.
You should not promise that you will be healed quickly, but rather let them know that it may take time for your condition to heal.

Teach your children about seven Cs

The seven Cs are: I didn’t cause it, it can’t be cured, it can’t control me, but I can take care of myself by communicating my feelings, making healthy choices, and celebrating myself.

A look at Mothers as Addicts

Although everyone is susceptible to addiction, the mother’s addiction could have a greater impact on family welfare than that of Dad.
The primary caregiver is still the mother. Sometimes, children may experience severe mental anguish. This may take time to (or never) completely heal.
If the parents are not careful, their addiction could be passed on to their children. Children can easily become addicts later in life. Addiction of mothers should therefore be a matter of concern.
You can find rehabilitation assistance in Northern Virginia at the end of this article. Or, contact Encore recovery center, Arlington VA.

The Addict is the Father

Addict Fathers have the same problems as Mothers with addiction, but they also bring their own set of problems to the household.
The father's addiction to alcohol, drugs, opiates, or narcotics is a matter of grave concern. The father's addiction can cause family dysfunction in many families.

The Impact of Father's Addiction on Parenting

The family's welfare is at risk when a father becomes addicted to drugs. This causes the greatest loss of life, and the children are the worst. They lose their paternal love and role model, security, self-worth, respect, and sense of purpose.
The National Association for Children of Alcoholics (NACoA) states that 25% of children younger than 18 years old are at risk of becoming addicted or alcoholics in their own homes.
These are the consequences.

Children lose their image of inspiration

Children raised in a nuclear family have a strong belief in their father's image as a "Superman." But, when he is held hostage by addiction, it can cause him to become helpless. If this happens, it can be confusing to children.

Low self-esteem

Children in drug and substance abuse homes are more likely to live in shame, silence, and secrecy. The research of Harvard's Beth Israel Medical Centre, (BIDMC) shows that children from drug-using families are four times more likely to be neglected than their peers.

Loss of trust

Fathers who are addicted to drugs often use their family money to buy the drug. This is when the father may lie to his wife and children about his drug addiction to satisfy his desire.
This can lead to mistrust in the marriage and their children. The father may keep making promises to his children but not delivering on them. Children may ask their dad, "Dad," if he promised to ...", but he has to lie again and continue putting off the promise. These feelings can lead to guilt, shame, and more drug abuse.

Poor academic performance

Children of addict families tend to do poorly in school. Children from addict families live in instability, inconsistency, and uncertainty. Children who are exposed to drugs abuse tend to experience developmental and mental delays, as well as difficulties in their education. This will undoubtedly harm academic performance.

Children learn destructive and harmful habits.

Children living with drug addict fathers must be educated about the dangers of drug dependence. The children of an addicted family may also be exposed to drug and substance abuse, which can limit their chances for success in life.
It is perfectly acceptable for Superman to use drugs (even though all evidence suggests otherwise).

Insecurity and instability

Indulgent drug abuse can lead to family dissolution, with the children staying with their mother and not their father. Their father may die if they become addicted to extreme amounts of drugs.
Mental and physical abuse
An addicted father may beat his children because of anger or mood swings that are triggered by using drugs. The drug-addicted father may also be more likely than others to abuse his teen daughters. Drugs and good judgment rarely mix.

How can you overcome drug addiction?

It is not an easy task to leave the world of drug addiction and drug abuse. There are many steps to take before you can get back on your feet.
Many rehabilitation centers offer help for addicts to alcohol and drugs. Many of them use the '12 steps' method. These steps are also known as "Alcoholic Anonymous 12 steps" but they can be used by Narcotics Anonymous.

These steps show how you can recover from addiction.

The 8th and 9th steps, which outline making amends to anyone who has hurt you either directly or indirectly, are often overlooked. Most people are concerned about the unknown outcome and the risk involved in these steps. Although the two steps might seem daunting, they could be crucial to a successful transition to a new life of sobriety.
It may be difficult to remember all the wrongs you did and compile a complete list. But make your inventory (inventory), from the best you can remember to help you get free.
For NA meetings in Virginia, please visit this link. Encore can be reached through this link to find a VA treatment center.
 

Sources:

https://www.mother.ly/parenting/should-kids-know-the-truth-about-a-parents-addiction
https://aforeverrecovery.com/blog/family-addiction/how-to-deal-with-a-mother-addicted-to-drugs/
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/divorced-with-kids-bounda_b_750285